Supportive Disciplines in the Way of Adidam

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The Emotional-Sexual Discipline

Emotional intimacy and sexual activity are two of the areas that most bind our energy and attention, as we can all gather, reflecting on our own life experiences and priorities. Avatar Adi Da Samraj refers to both of these as a single area of human life, making the point that sex is actually rooted in the heart:


Sane sexuality is love expressed. If you energize yourself sexually over and over again, you lose your heart. You become fleshy, cold, opaque, unnatural, diseased, mad. People who are addicted to sexuality in itself are mad. Like alcohol or drugs, sex is a loveless automaticity that destroys people’s lives. . . . In the Way of Adidam sex is about the intimate relationship. . . . Sex is an emotional-sexual matter.

Avatar Adi Da Samraj


Because of this, how we relate to another sexually is a direct reflection of how we are patterned to relate emotionally.

While a vast amount could be written (and has been written by Avatar Adi Da Samraj) about the emotional-sexual area and its discipline, two of the key aspects are:

  • Understanding and transcending oedipal patterning by being love

  • Understanding and transcending the addiction to the degenerative orgasm

Understanding and transcending oedipal patterning by being love

As Freud first pointed out, we suffer our entire lives from profound, dysfunctional relational patterns initially catalyzed in childhood through our relations with our mother and father, and then projected onto all women and men (respectively), particular those we hold “intimate”. At the core of this oedipal patterning is the feeling of rejection (the original rejection presumed to have been performed by the parent of the opposite sex, who chose the same-sexed parent over us). This pattern is transcended by replacing the ritual, abusive expression, “You do not love me” (yet another of our compulsions or addictive habits), with the self-transcending practice and ordeal of “I love you”:


The egoic (or self-Contracted) individual Is . . . Chronically Bound To The Ritual Of Rejection. The emotional (or emotional-sexual) Career Of egoity Tends To Manifest As A Chronic Complaint That Always Says, By Countless Means, “You Do Not Love me.” This Abusive Complaint Is Itself The Means Whereby the egoic individual Constantly Enforces his or her Chronic Wanting Need To Reject, Avoid, or Fail To Love others. Indeed, This Complaint Is More Than A Complaint. It Is A self-Image (The Heart-Sick or self-Pitying and Precious Idea That “I” Is Rejected) and An Angry Act Of Retaliation (Whereby others Are Punished For Not Sufficiently Adoring, pleasurizing, and Immortalizing the Precious ego-”I”). . . .

Once This Is (In The Way of Adidam) Truly, and Completely, and Most Fundamentally Understood, The Ritual Of Rejection, Fear, egoity, self-Contraction, or Un-Love Can Be Directly Transcended, If Only It Is Summarily Replaced By The Ordeal (or Discipline and Practice) Of self-Transcending Love, and (Then, By Grace) Heart-Communion With and (Ultimately) Heart-Communication Of The Divine Self-Condition, In The Form, “I Love You”.

Avatar Adi Da Samraj


Just as we engage this or that distraction to avoid feeling boredom, doubt, or discomfort, so we engage the ritual of rejecting others in order not to feel the vulnerability that is inherent in being love, which Avatar Adi Da describes as “the wound of love”:


For those who Are Committed To Love (and who Always Commune With The One Who Is Love), Even Rejection By others Is Received and Accepted As A Wound, Not An Insult [That Justifies Retaliation]. Even The Heart-Necessity To Love and To Be Loved Is [In Itself] A Wound. Even The Fullest Realization Of Love [In The Awakened State] Is A Wound That Never Heals. . . .

Love Does Not Fail For You When You Are Rejected or Betrayed or Apparently Not Loved. Love Fails For You When You Reject, Betray, and Do Not Love. . . .Be Vulnerable. Be Wounded When Necessary, and Endure That Wound or Hurt. Do Not Punish the other In Love. . . . The Most Direct Way To Know Love In every moment Is To Be Love In every moment.

Avatar Adi Da Samraj


Communion with the Divine “The One Who Is Love” is the secret to being able to “be love” to others, in feeling and in action.

Understanding and transcending the addiction to the degenerative orgasm

Because the orgasm is the greatest pleasure conventionally available to us, most of us are addicted to orgasm as it conventionally occurs. Unfortunately, from the Spiritual viewpoint, a conventional orgasm is a “degenerative orgasm”, in the sense that it creates a break in the energy being conducting in the circle of the body-mind; instead of the energy circulating down the frontal line and up the spinal line, at the moment of degenerative orgasm, the energy leaks out through the genitials (in both men and women).

the circle of the body-mind

Avatar Adi Da Samraj provides a different discipline. Through feeling-Contemplation of Adi da Samraj (while making love), combined with practices that control sexual intensity (e.g., through whole bodily relaxation), as well as the practice of “tensing the bodily base” to maintain the integrity of the “plumbing” at this turn-around point in the energy flow from the frontal line to the spinal line, at the moment of what otherwise would be a degenerative orgasm, the orgasm is converted. The energy doesn’t leak out the genitals but instead is conducted upward at the bodily base and shoots up the spine and throughout the entire body. Avatar Adi Da Samraj calls this a regenerative orgasm. With practice, this regenerative orgasm becomes a very pleasurable whole bodily thrill, that increases the energy of the body, as well as its well-being and feeling of fullness. And through practice of regenerative orgasm, the addiction to degenerative orgasm loses its force over time.

Avatar Adi Da Samraj also provides an analogous practice, referred to as the “own-body” sexual practice, for converting conventional (degenerative) sexual masturbation into regenerative orgasm. This practice was adapted from the traditional, esoteric, monastic practice known as Shaktichalana Mudra.


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